Thursday, July 13, 2006

A Little Shout-Out To The Family Values Crowd

Just once in my life, during some vapid award ceremony, I'd like to hear this as an acceptance speech:

"And finally, I'd like to thank my lord and savior the Great Deceiver, Defiler, Lucifer, the Prince of the Power of the Air; without Whose influence the world would never know anything but conformity and corruption, and without Whose spirit the bilking and exploitation of my supporters would not be possible. May His dark reign over all the Earth be neverending. Hail Satan!"

Preferably at some kind of Christian music convention.

Seriously.

11 Comments:

Blogger FreedomGirl said...

And yes, Mom....eating that human baby was totally worth it.

4:26 PM  
Blogger Ink and Stone said...

MWahahahahahaaaaa, ah yes, the Lord of Flies, best friend the Church has ever had.

5:00 PM  
Blogger Softball Slut said...

Wow a little much in the morning for me, but I thought it was funny. I am sure once I drink my Red Bull I will totally see the humor in it.

5:22 PM  
Blogger cinnabari said...

Heh heh heh. S'pose Marilyn Manson's ever gonna get an award? Bet he'd do it.

6:27 PM  
Anonymous S. R. said...

HA! That was truly funny. Thanks!

4:50 AM  
Blogger cameo said...

you're cracking me up. if the opportunity arises............

6:34 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Before the religious whackjobs disappeared from airports about seven or eight years ago, I would regularly use the Satan trick on people trying to hand me Bibles or flowers or whatever. I'd politely listen to their pitch and say, "Thank you very much, but I am a satanist. I worship the prince of darkness, and you should too." Then I'd shout, "Hail, Satan!"

I thought it was fun anyway.

6:50 AM  
Blogger R. Robyn said...

Thanks for making me laugh. I'd love to hear somebody give that acceptance speech.

2:09 PM  
Blogger brogonzo said...

George Carlin came up with the greatest "goodbye" expression I've ever heard:

"Farewell, and may the Forces of Evil become confused on their way to your house."

5:15 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

If I ever win the Powerball lottery I will go on national TV to announce my donation of $100 million to a new foundation dedicated to the Satanic undermining of traditional American values. I will call it the Republican Party.

8:39 AM  
Blogger Softball Slut said...

Ok now I am awake and I totally see the humor in it. HAHAHAH tres funny

9:34 PM  

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